Quest of the Vampire Lords, part 4

The ground started to crack. Lord Tanz lifted his rifle and paused, staring down his sight at the hideously bleached Marask. Whatever was staring back was not the former Vampire Lord. Those sunken eyes were full of menace, and contained a hunger. It wasn't bloodlust; just a terrifying need to devour the world. I could feel nothing of a true vampire inside Lord Marask. His blood should vibrate with our own, allowing us at least a hint of his emotional state.

Something else positively lurked inside Marask.

We kept our distance from the sweeping tentacles, which had drawn back, awaiting our move. Even Ursgelda had not been able to approach Marask. We were a little out of our league.

“I don't want this.”

Uldin had spoken. He had, until now, been very reserved. Now, I sensed his blood absolutely starting to boil. Uldin was a dignified vampire, for sure. He was taller than Ursgelda and me, and always stood erect, gleaming in his top hat and silver suit. Not actual silver, of course, as my werewolf nose wouldn't be happy about that. But he did have that gleam, brightened by the moonlight that reflected on the snow. He seemed to hunch a little as he stepped forward, and then he stepped a little more, reaching into his suit, which had been a neat fit as far as I had noticed.

Imagine my surprise when he produced two hand grenades! Where exactly had he been hiding those? Geez, these men and their deep pockets...That's like something my boss would do.

“If we're killing our old Lord, I'd rather he went out with a bang. But you know, I'm just thinking to myself here. It seems like these wiggly things don't want us to get too close to Lord Marask. That's a little interesting. Like he's protected. Fine, then. Let's see them protect him from this.”

Uldin flicked the pins out with his thumbs and hurled both grenades at Lord Marask. Just as he had predicted, the tentacles moved to block the projectiles. We all darted backward a dozen paces, and I caught Ursgelda smiling again. Her injuries hadn't slowed her down, and I thought she might have been testing her chances with this new creature. The tentacles were three times my height, at least. They were swift enough to hold off Ursgelda, and they were definitely swift enough to close around Marask, shielding him from this new threat.

Betcha a shiny gold coin they didn't understand that threat at all, because the grenades plopped off the tentacles and came to rest in the snow. Then, they blasted half the slimy skin right off the clustered tentacles that had protected the possessed vampire.

Uldin bowed. “Your opening, Lord Ursgelda.”

Ursgelda winked at him. “Bold player. Everybody! Wear that thing down!”

I felt another shaking underfoot, but there wasn't time to worry about that. I followed Ursgelda, and side by side, we ran into the thresher of tentacles. They were much more reluctant after taking a bruising. Ursgelda slashed at them with her hands. Vampire fingernails were just as deadly as fangs. She couldn't cut deep, but she could make a dozen tearing cuts before having to dodge another tentacle. One nearly got her, but I caught it in my metal arm and squeezed. It had a surprising resilience, but I kept squeezing, and eventually there was a sickening popping sound. It flailed wildly, then slowed to a pathetic limp on the ground, unable to rise. Other tentacles appeared, but my arm batted them away with little trouble.

Shots rang out as Tanz and company began firing into the tentacle fray. I was tripped up, but rolled back easily, coming out on all fours and rising to my full werewolf height. This time, I caught a tentacle and tried to yank it from the ground.

Transforming into a werewolf has a few disadvantages. For ease of explanation, let's just say I get a little dumber. For the truth, though, my senses become less focused on touch and sight, and much more focused on smell and hearing. My reaction time is much better, but I think about my actions a lot less. It's just part of werewolf life.

So I tugged at the tentacle half a dozen times before realizing that it was attached to something much, much bigger. Now the shaking underfoot became a little worrisome.

I felt the snow and ice start to slide. I saw the streets of the town caving in, the shacks starting to collapse, and the slow spilling of the insects into a cavernous pit that was opening. I watched as Ursgelda came face to face with Marask. She paused, a look of confusion spiderwebbing over her face, and it was enough time for a tentacle to nearly take her head off. Instead, she caught the flinging tendril, and Ursgelda was hurled high into the sky, where she twisted around several times, trying to right herself.

Ursgelda flapped her wings, steadying herself.

“Back, everyone! The whole town's going under!”

I looked at Marask, noting that he wasn't actually standing on solid ground. The shaking intensified, and a voice boomed over the mountains.

What are you creatures, so filled with the light? You are not like this one. Why have you turned from the darkness?

It felt disgusting! If there was a voice the polar opposite of a siren's, this was it. I tried to cover my ears, but it was everywhere. I retreated, just as a tentacle tried to crush me. I can't believe I had charged at this thing! I guess the wolf in me knew that I could handle it, but things were getting pretty close, and it seemed like something wanted to talk.

“What exactly are you, that ensnares a Vampire Lord? I've never seen your kind.” Ursgelda remained in the air. She looked like that last strike had taken a lot out of her.

I joined Tanz, Uldin, and Zelina, who waited atop a snow bank. All three hummed with a desire to destroy the creature that had taken Marask.

I am so much more than little vampires. I am before your kind. I am before the humans. I come from the darkness that crept into the first vampires. I am from the spaces where the sunlight is a myth. You belong to us, vampires. And we will take what is ours.

I felt worry in Ursgelda's blood. I tried to think. How could we stop this abomination? We couldn't even put a face to it, though in a moment, it would probably rise from the ground, gigantic as a mountain. I imagined some putrid creature, devouring everything in its sight. This might just be one of those “run like hell” moments.

I really wish Ray Peril were here. He wouldn't just know what to do, he probably would have done it by now. And he'd probably do it with a~

Ursgelda started laughing. It didn't hit quite the same, but it was welcome. She must have had a plan. I liked plans. They meant we might get out of this alive.

While we all watched on, Ursgelda shook a finger at a creature that we couldn't see. I didn't think Ursgelda could do much, speaking honestly. Her shadow magic was evenly matched by her opponent, but in every other sense, she was at a disadvantage. This thing was much stronger than we were. Perhaps we were more nimble, but there must be thirty tentacles rising from this pit. And that voice! This was a whole new darkness; well beyond the caves of sinister vampires.

“A whole world hidden from sunlight? Don't be ridiculous. We're vampires. We know all about darkness creeping in. But you should see when the light arrives! It never creeps. It shines, fantastic!”

I had to cover my eyes in the initial flash. Ursgelda always soaked up sunlight, ever since Ray Peril changed her into a light-drinking vampire. It was something I could do as well, but Ursgelda had tested it to the limit when she invaded Galenia, and had mastered the use of the sun's energy. I wasn't sure if this was magic, or if she was just a big, undead flashlight, but she glowed as bright as sunlight in the misty, arctic air.

The creature screamed. It felt like a scream, I mean. It manifested inside my head, and tried to work its way out. The pain of it was too much. The three vampires behind me clutched their heads and fell, and I panicked, not sure how to help them, and how to keep from falling myself.

“Don't let up, Silence! Give us a song!”

I flipped the werewolf switch off and started to sing. Instantly, the sound in my head vanished. The others came to their senses, and slowly stood. I could feel my song blocking out the voice. It recoiled, unable to compete with my beautiful intonations. I was trying to mimic the words of the wizard, hoping that maybe some of the magic would work its way from my song. I thought it was really clever.

But the wizard's voice echoed in my head. Yeah, that's not gonna work. Can't sing those words. It stirs the word soup improperly. Also, I didn't cop any feel on that gross vampire. I don't care what she says.

Welp.

I mean, I tried. Still, the combination of song and sunlight seemed to be working. The tentacles were sizzling in Ursgelda's light, and they shook like my song was causing pain.

There was a problem. Ursgelda would run out of light well before she could burn away this monster. It was clever enough to keep the light from Marask, who would burn to a crisp. Fallen tentacles formed a wall around him. It seemed he was a vessel for whatever was rising from underground. I could keep up my song indefinitely, or at least until I was too tired to sing, but without a vital point to strike, we were going to have to run.

“Uldin, you fool! Vhere are you going?”

Uldin darted ahead just as Ursgelda flickered out. She fell from the sky, too worn to catch herself. I would have to retrieve her, but just now I had to keep singing, or Uldin was doomed. He was running right into the mess of tentacles. He dodged well, though far too slow to survive long. Zelina and Tanz raised their guns and tried to cover him, but the bullets did little to the tentacles. I gave the creature a high note, just as Uldin lunged toward Lord Marask.

I was probably the only one who heard him say, “You can have the darkness back when we're done with it.”

Uldin barreled into Marask, and they both fell into the pit. Marask screamed, and the echo died off quickly, but it had not been the scream of the true Vampire Lord. It was that of whatever monster had spoiled his mind.

The tentacles began to recede. Some of them fizzled away into nothingness. Several caught fire. The ground slid away underfoot, and I dashed away to fetch my own Vampire Lord, picking up her light body in my metal arm and hurrying back to Tanz and Zelina, both of them staring in shock at the pit, which now threatened to open up and swallow us as well.

Over the shaking ground, Tanz shouted. “Back to the mountain!”

We all took off, but Zelina turned, and I saw her frown at the pit. “Imbecile. Vhy vould you do such a sing?”

She turned away, reluctantly, and followed us to the mountain.

It was easy going, all the way up, and at the three-quarter point, we turned, and watched as the rest of the town slide away into the abyss. It didn't seem as deep around the edges, but at the center, where Marask had stood, there was a wide pit that was so dark, I couldn't tell how far down it went. When the ground stopped shaking, and all motion stopped below, Lord Tanz said, “Let's get out of here. I feel uneasy in this place.”

I couldn't agree more.

Ursgelda stirred. I had her draped over my shoulder, and she groaned in my ear. “Thing beat the bloodlust right outta me...”

I held her there. I would probably never get over how my life had ended up. Imagine, just a short time ago, a weak girl like me trying to climb a mountain while carrying someone over my shoulder. And here I was, not even phased by it. Even granting that, I was still terrified by what had happened. I was a monster now, yet I still found things that frightened me no end.

Okay, being fair about it, scary movies still frightened me. Not that I found many opportunities for them. Busy, busy.

We came to the town where the airship was docked, and strolled in from the mountain path. I could already tell something was wrong.

I told you. I tried to tell you. Between that monster and your singing, I couldn't get the words right in your head. This is a place of sacrifice. You should get out of here.

It was that old man again. The wizard had mentioned him, and said he had important things to say.

Ursgelda finally climbed down, resting on my shoulder.

“Well, sister? What is happening now? I don't think I can handle another encounter with those tentacles.”

We stood outside the town, and everyone was hesitant to enter. Would there be more insects? Was another creature waiting for us? Nothing of the sort. I sniffed the air, and pointed to the airship.

“Vhat are you saying? Ze people are on ze ship?”

I shook my head. Once again, all the people in the town were gone. And I just knew there would be no bodies. But I smelled blood, and I knew the others could smell it as well. Vampires had senses that rivaled a werewolf when it came to blood.

“Bah! Let's get to that airship already. No more vampires will die today, if I have anything to say about it.”

Lord Tanz stomped off toward the airship. We strolled through the town, right behind him. Ursgelda staggered. Her blood groaned, but not from her own pain. She felt as though she had somehow failed the others. They did not share her feelings. In their blood, they were thankful that she was with us. More disturbing was Zelina's blood. She was not taking the loss of Uldin very well. I sensed despair. In this lonely place, where the only life consisted of four undead vampires, I sympathized.

All of this was very depressing. More depressing was what awaited us at the dock. We climbed the stairs into the airship. The ship was nearly desolate. One man waited, half asleep as we entered. He saw us and looked absolutely mortified. He could tell we were vampires.

“Good heavens!”

Lord Tanz placed a hand on the man's shoulder. “Would that this were heaven, and not some kind of hell, friend. Relax. We are not here to drink. We want out of here, and if you know what's good for you, you will want the same. There are worse monsters than us down there.”

No man in that situation would know what to do, other than exactly what the vampire asked. I lived under vampires, once. Ursgelda ruled over my town like a tyrant, and her vampires kept us all so frightened that we wouldn't dare to disobey. It took resisting an otherworldly invasion to change the view of vampires, back where I came from. This man would not be ready to accept pleasant vampires for some time.

We found a room. It didn't matter which one. It was smaller than the one we had arrived with, but we were also short one cold body. Everybody sat quietly, waiting. When the ship started moving, I saw Ursgelda looking thoughtful.

There were a few jolts as the metal fasteners disengaged, and we felt the ship slip from the mooring. We were off, and this nightmare was finally over. I sat on the bed, trying to think of a nice way to suggest conking out Zelina once more. In the end, I looked at Ursgelda, pointed at Zelina, then pointed at my head.

Zelina stood up. She heaved a big sigh and said, “No, no. I vill do it myself, sank you very much!”

She conked herself over the head. On the third try, she collapsed on the floor. I stared at Ursgelda, who shrugged, and then I stood up, went over to the limp body, and pressed my hand to the side of her head. The ghost jumped from me to her, and she groaned and stood.

“This poor creature has an incredible headache. I think you should all stop hitting her, much as I don't care for vampires.”

Lord Tanz sat in a chair and watched us, curious. “Who is this?”

I shrugged. Ursgelda leaned on her cane and said, “Whoever it is, it's something important, isn't it?”

“Exactly, you horrible drinker of blood. Sorry. My manners. Vampires.” He spat the word. “Back in our world, and a very long time ago, there was a darkness. Few knew about it, but on the fringes of this darkness, the vampires lived, slithering as they did in the caves for centuries. This great evil, hiding at the center of it all, manipulated all manner of monsters into terrorizing humanity. This would be long before you, Ursgelda. Very, very long before the wolves. If any were old enough to remember, it would be the sirens, or the succubi. There were less monsters then, but they were powerful creatures. They drank the darkness from a thing so foul that it cannot be named. Men tried to write a name for it, but the books went out of control, and when one man finally succeeded, he locked away the darkness with powerful binding magic, and what was left existed as something thinner than a shadow.

“It still had a voice, and it was so cunning and patient. They exist in many worlds, and bridge the gap between life and death. They are hungry. Things that are sacrificed to them can open this world to devastation beyond anything you can imagine. It is no surprise they overcame the will of a vampire. Why, I fear that if you were not drinkers of the sunlight, you might also have fallen before them. And there is more danger here than I have ever seen from the world we came from. Someone is making sacrifices. There are secret cults around our world that know of these monsters, and it seems the same is true on this world. My mind was lost to the study of the magic books and the teachings of the old wizards. Before it consumed me, I learned of several such places, where sacrifice was made to monsters, and none of them were as large as the village you saw. Whatever is here has been subdued, but it has been fed, and will continue to grow in this world. You must stop the sacrifices. That is all I can really say about it. The knowledge I have would drive the living mad. I am a dead man, and this is not an affair the dead should interfere with. Oh, the girl is waking up. Vampires heal very quickly, don't they? I will return to my contemplations. Do not let this world fall. Even one world would help to awaken the others.”

With a pop, Zelina's usual look returned. “Vell, at least zis von did not feel ze copper.”

I didn't touch anything! Came the voice of the wizard in my head. It was like babysitting, I swear...

The door to our room burst open, and there stood Lord Marask, pale and grim as ever.

A half-dead Uldin leaned against his shoulder, sagging. Marask entered without a thought as Zelina and Tanz gasped, suddenly afraid. I shifted, ready to get to my feet, but to the surprise of all of us, except Ursgelda, Marask placed Uldin against the bed, stepped past me, and took a seat across from Tanz. Tanz, his face a mask of fear, did not move.

“How did he do it?” Ursgelda asked.

Lord Tanz reached up and shifted the collar of his fur coat, revealing his neck. “The clever boy bit me and filled me with the sunlight. Yet I did not burn. But that demon certainly melted from my blood. What did you do to my clan, woman?”

Ursgelda smirked. Lord Tanz stepped in and said, “This is Lord Ursgelda, a vampire from another world. She tried to help us rescue you.”

Without looking around, Lord Marask muttered, “I see. And we are to behave, is that it? What of that one?”

The former Lord pointed at me. I stared back at him. My vampire blood was curious as to how he might stack up against Ursgelda and me. The little girl inside me tried to hide in her wolf skin. Marask looked a lot like the vampires that had enslaved my village. The vanguard had been hideous and wicked. In his worn out state, he was positively wretched.

“She is a strange creature. She carries the blood of wolves. This one is Silence, probably because she cannot speak.”

Marask slowly retracted his pointing finger. “And yet I heard a thousand voices from her head. Now tell me,” Marask said, turning to Ursgelda, the chair groaning as he slid slowly around, “what it is that you came here for.”

Ursgelda stood. She hopped up and kept her balance against her cane. “I didn't come. I was sent, and I intend to have a lot to complain about when I return to my master. I believe he sent me here to help deal with this problem, but I also believe he sent me to warn you. In my world, he came through the vampires like a real demon. Worse. I laughed at him, until he knocked on my door one day, and I was the only vampire left. My advice is this: Take the sunlight. Spread the bite. There is no one and nothing in this world that could stop him, including whatever we just faced. Vampires belong in the shadow of humans, not the shadow of this darkness. Do not give my master a reason to take a personal interest. He will take it very personally.”

Marask nodded. “It feels wrong, but I can sense the fear you had for your master. Your blood cannot shake it. And what now?”

“You take up the Lordship, and return your vampires to greatness.”

Marask smiled at this. “This I cannot do.”

Ursgelda tilted her head. “Oh? Why not?”

“Don't play games, Lord from another world. You can fool everyone else in this room. I can read you plain as any Vampire Lord. I'm surprised the wolf hasn't caught on yet.”

I hadn't. What was he talking about?

Ursgelda chuckled. She clutched her stomach and positively cackled. Then she snorted a little and, finally, whimpered as she held one hand to her ribs. “Ooh, you're a clever one. Yes, I did see the potential in Lord Tanz. I didn't think you'd see it the same. I must say it's a shock! You're saying you agree that Lord Tanz is a worthy Lord? And you wouldn't challenge his position?”

“I am saying that.”

Lord Tanz slammed his hands on the table. “What is the meaning of this? We rescued you to lead us! How can you say that I am the proper Lord for our clan, when you sit right there, across from me? I am not half the vampire you are, my Lord Marask!”

“Yes, indeed! Zere is so much power in Marask! And he has come back from ze dead. Vell, more zan is usual for ze undead, I mean.”

Ursgelda paced over to Zelina, leaning against the taller woman with her hand outstretched. “Now, now. Don't be hasty, young one. Marask doesn't know my game, but he feels it in my blood, clear as it flows in the vein. I witnessed that little show you all put on. Tanz prepared for this trip with the weapons of man. No vampire I've ever met would bother to bring guns. We're a basic bunch, with claw and fang and shadow being all we rely on. Marask can see that. He lived through it. He went seeking help, and was unprepared. The clan was left in disarray. Do you think that would happen under Lord Tanz? If I am reading Marask as well as he reads me, he does not think so.”

Lord Tanz leaned back in his chair. “You have often praised my foresightedness, Lord Marask. But how can I hold such a position with you in the clan? Don't tell me you seek exile after we just rescued you. We need you.”

Marask took on a serious face. “Then I will be your Second. Place these two in your High Council. I will do what I have always done best, and skulk in the shadows. None will challenge your position so long as I sit at your side. And I will play the role of your advisor. It is not only the best option, it is the only one open to you. My mind is made up. I have other work. You must lead the clan.”

“Other work?”

“Yes.”

Marask narrowed his eyes. “I will find a way to destroy that which imprisoned me. Permanently.”

Ursgelda clapped her hands. “Brilliant! Yes, and if I do say so, that will save me a lot of work. For my part, there is only one question I have left.”

“And zat is?” said Zelina, politely trying to pull away from Ursgelda.

“Where is the pilot? Everyone in that town was dead and gone. So who decided to start flying the ship?”

Five minutes of wandering the steamy corridors, and Ursgelda's suspicions were confirmed. Many people had been responsible for this flight when we left the mainland. Now there was almost no one aboard. We found the man that had greeted us earlier. Found him in about three different places, skin shredded in a ghastly manner by something so twisted that it had clawed the man's heart out. We searched some of the rooms, then Tanz pointed at the steam pipes and traced the way to the upper deck. There were rails and doors everywhere, and the steam made picking out a scent difficult. However, the closer we got to the helm, the more blood we smelled. And in the end, there was a stench so strange, I couldn't account for it other than that someone had on a lot of makeup.

Ursgelda opened the door to the pilot's deck. Velvet carpet and carpeted walls drowned out the sound of the ship. Ursgelda stepped in first, and I followed behind. We gave the others enough room to join us. Not a word was spoken. Uldin closed the door behind us, and we all moved forward, halfway across a red carpet. We stopped, and everyone just stared at the tall figure at the helm.

It did not turn to face us. It stood, quiet, stiff, only moving its arms gently one way, then another, turning the wheel that guided the rudders. Thick furs surrounded its shoulders. A long coat draped down its back, and I could see its thin wrists and gnarled hands. The creature was bald and pale, but not like the rest of us. He was smeared with powder and paint, which explained the makeup smell.

There was also a strong smell of blood.

“I know this one.” said Marask.

And now, the lanky creature before us turned. His eyes were drawn back in his skull, and he had a sick pallor, much like Marask. His head rolled to one side and offered us a smile. I made a soft noise that, for me, counts as a gasp, since even that was too much for my voice to manage.

Strewn over the mouth of this strange vampire, blood had plastered itself to his face, shaped in a terrible, dripping smile.

“Lord Marask...you seem so empty now. The voice has left your head, but it creeps around the edges. It's always at the edges.”

“Zat is a member of ze High Council!”

Uldin rested against Zelina and nodded. “The Mad Jester! The Harlequin himself!”

Lord Tanz said, “You have taken the nickname rather far, haven't you?”

And Marask said, “He is poisoned, same as I was.”

“Poisoned?” The Harlequin released the wheel and turned fully round on us. Even with that big coat on, he looked so thin that he might fall apart. I didn't often feel sick, what with being a vampire with some pretty violent and gruesome cravings, but looking at this Harlequin disturbed something in me.

The Harlequin smiled. I could smell the blood on his painted face, and it was from the little man whose heart had been ripped out. “I was not a puppet of the darkness, Lord Marask. It came to me, through my studies in the vault libraries of our arctic brothers. The voices found me, and I embraced them. So much power! So much blood. Can you understand the irresistible nature of it? The very spirit of lifeblood flows in the darkness. The sweet promises. I would drink them all!”

“You mean you betrayed your clan?” Marask was ready to bite the Harlequin's head off, the way he snapped the words out.

The Harlequin laughed. “The clan is nothing! Vampires are nothing! There is only the blood, Marask, and to wake the spirit of blood requires a great sacrifice of blood. We will all be blood in the darkness, soon. It needs more, though. It is hungry.”

Ursgelda took several steps toward the Harlequin. “So you took over this ship, and brought the sacrifices. How did you manage that? How did you fool the humans?”

“Fool them? The little Lord asks questions. I did not need the power of the darkness for that.”

The Harlequin lifted his arms and launched into his explanation with a crazed gleam in his eyes. He gesticulated, looking up to the ceiling as if staring out into the dark sky beyond. “My bite alone enthralled the crew, and I kept them in such a daze that it never occurred to them to question the pilot. When I brought Marask to the Great Dark Ones, he never suspected that they would use his power to help gather the sacrifices. He was so useful; devouring a whole town in his frenzied hunger. After that, fresh deliveries to the harbor, bringing them in by the dozens, and helping the darkness to rise, to rise!”

The Harlequin turned. Ursgelda was staring up at him, expressionless, leaning on her cane.

“And you will do nicely for the next sacrifice!”

The Harlequin's hand shot out with an inhuma...No, with an invampire speed. I thought for sure Ursgelda would have trouble dodging it, considering her injuries. Even I had to wonder at how quickly the Harlequin moved. Ursgelda's head twisted to the side, as if slapped.

But in her fangs, the arm of the Harlequin was caught, ripped from his body like a clipped coupon, good for half off.

The Harlequin stared at Ursgelda, but he didn't howl in pain or stagger. His mind was so gone, he just stood, smiling, watching her.

So, being in no mood for any of this, Ursgelda made a move of her own, and with a quiet swish, the Harlequin's head rolled round in the air and fell. Ursgelda caught it by the ear, executing the grab with a precision thumb and forefinger.

She spat the arm away. “Lord Tanz? Lord Marask? My apologies. I did not feel like saving this one. He offended every ounce of my vampire blood. Didn't even appeal to the succubus in me.”

She tossed the head away and licked her fingers just a little too casually.

“Anyone know how to fly this thing?” Ursgelda asked.

“Ah, vell, I know a sing or two about zese sings, yes. Lord Tanz vas alvays so encouraging vis my hobbies.”

Ursgelda stood aside, a little surprised. “I...was not expecting a 'yes' from anyone, but sure.”

“No vorries, no vorries! Besides, I don't vant someone hitting me again just so some pilot can possess my body. I have had three men inside me already! Zat is enough.”

Everybody went completely silent as she took the wheel. We just stared at her, while the walls absorbed the sound of our thoughts. Uldin tried to quietly clear his throat.

“Shutup, Uldin! I can hear you sinking it! Vhat is wrong vis all of you?”

A noise interrupted our witty banter. I spun round, and at the same time, the vampires leapt away. There was a green glow, and a light humming sound. The air behind us swirled, and the green expanded, giving us a window to...

Well, what a strange place! And through that window, stepped a familiar face. Ursgelda barked at the girl that appeared.

“Oh, what now? You know, we could have used your help a while ago.”

Maniacala Elishard, the secretary of Ray Peril, took a bow. “My Master said you wouldn't be needing me for this. But...” She checked her clipboard. “...Yes, it seems it's time to go. Master is still busy, but he's got a few other vacation spots for you two. And...right. Says here I'm supposed to tell you that you'll love them, but also that I'm lying, and not to mention that part, so I'm not going to read that one out loud.”

Ursgelda sighed. She turned to the other vampires, who were all watching the girl with fright in their eyes.

“Yes. She's a devil. But she's with us, so relax. It looks like this is where we get off this airship. The rest will be up to you four.”

Marask started to step forward, then stopped. “Lord Tanz? You should see our visitors off.”

Lord Tanz approached Ursgelda, and extended a hand.

“A handshake? You really do think like the humans.”

Ursgelda shook his hand and smiled. “Good luck. Do me a favor and make sure you kill whatever that thing was.”

“I doubt we will focus on much else. I shall enlist the humans to help.”

Ursgelda took her cane and stepped toward the portal. “I doubt it will be easy, but if there's anything that can get this world on the proper footing, it's madness. Just look at Elishard here! Totally mad, but she keeps a checklist! Come on, Tammy. It appears we have more work to do!”

I slapped my hands to my cheeks and nearly swooned. She called me by my name!
“Actually,” said Elishard, “I lied and told you it was a vacation, remember? So you don't know that it's really work. Because I lied.”

We all stared at her.

“Let's just go.” said Ursgelda. “Let's just go.”

And so we did. Maybe we weren't heading out for a vacation, but for my part, I'd had enough questing with all these Vampire Lords.

We followed Elishard through the portal, and to our next adventure.